OK, I haven't posted in a while, so I figured I would take this time to tease myself before anyone else does, thus removing some of the sting. ; )
Story 1 :
Mike and Lori's Wedding. We were all at the church and were about to start the ceremony when all of a sudden, my Richard Colon kicked in and I had to take a shath. Now, I tried to wait it out, but got my infamous shath hole pains. (Little Background on my shath hole pains...SHP...when I need to poop REALLY bad, I get these INTENSE pains in my poop hole. It feels like someone is stabbing me with a friggen butcher knife and makes me want to shit myself).
Anyway, there I was...fending off the butcher knife, and my shath, when I decided I had enough time to take the Browns to the Super Bowl. So I did...and after I was done...I put my coat back on and saw a slight stain on my cuff link. After furtner examination from my eyes and nose, I determined it to be a shath stain. A shath stain on my cuff link. HOW DO YOU GET SKID MARKS ON YOUR SHIRT?!?! Leave it up to me.
I don't think I told anyone but Bec...
Story 2 :
This one is embarrassing to I will make this short and sweet.
Volleyball...Labor Day or Memorial Day or some day we had off...sweaty ass...incoming poop...toilet paper on toilet to prevent getting herpes...toilet paper attached to sweaty ass hanging out of shorts when I get back on court.
*runs away crying, toilet paper flapping in the wind behind me*
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3 comments:
Yes, i remember both of those so well, how about Mikes wedding and me not knowing were i was going and getting lost and you not carng where i was, Wow, i love that one;) You played the toliet paper hanging out of shorts pretty good, you didnt seem that embaressed.
OMG jason i was laughing so hard reading this. i was picturing it and it made it that much funnier!! i love the way you tell stories, you are so funny!!
i love and miss you!!!
LMAO!! HAHAHA! You had poop stains at mikes wedding!! LOL that is pretty funny! I dont remember the volleyball one...hey at least you didnt fall over a bunch of chairs right? lol
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